Do you ever get to a point where you feel like no matter what you do, you wish you had done the opposite, or gone a different direction. I wouldn't necessarily call it a regret because I have learned from it and still continue to do so, its just...I know things would have been a lot easier had I went down another path. This is my apology to you. I wish I had listened more. I wish I had talked less but spoken up when it mattered the most. I wish I hadn't shut you out. I wish I would have reacted differently under the circumstances. I wish I had told you the truth from the very beginning no matter how much I thought it would have hurt you. I wish I wasn't scared to be in love. I wish I knew how to fix it now. But more than anything I wish you could forgive me. I pray that the Lord will hold you and heal your heart. I pray that He will bless you beyond your imagination. I pray that He will show you a happiness that you've never known. And I pray that He will help you forgive me. Not today, not tomorrow, not next week or even next month, just when it is the right time for you.
Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers. 3 John 2
Love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like a blazing fire.
Song of Solomon 8:6.
It is my prayer to someday be fireproof.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
give me something real.
Welcome back to the real world. I can already tell this last semester of nursing school is going to be a challenge. Between class, lab, clinical, working 2 jobs, and hopefully picking up a couple of shifts at the hospital as a CNA or sitter and the big one STUDYING I don't know when I'm going to have time to live! But hey, its only until December. Stronghold? I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.
Humira is still working just as we had hoped which is fantastic! And I'm pretty sure my insurance is going to cover the great majority of the expense which is even better! All praise be Him :)
There's an old cliche that goes, "I just want one guy to prove to me they aren't all the same." There really isn't a better phrase to describe how I'm feeling. Prove to me that you mean what you say. Show me that you really are a gentleman. Talk to me about things that are going on in your life and listen while I do the same. And if it just isn't working out for you anymore be man and tell me. For a complicated girl, I'm not too hard to figure out.
The Lord really helped me let go of something I had been holding onto for quite some time this week. I realized worrying about things I couldn't change wasn't doing anything but hurting me. It's an amazing feeling knowing that when we lay things at His feet and leave them there, He will ease our pain. Sometimes we learn more when we are held by the Lord rather than just being healed by the Lord.
Humira is still working just as we had hoped which is fantastic! And I'm pretty sure my insurance is going to cover the great majority of the expense which is even better! All praise be Him :)
There's an old cliche that goes, "I just want one guy to prove to me they aren't all the same." There really isn't a better phrase to describe how I'm feeling. Prove to me that you mean what you say. Show me that you really are a gentleman. Talk to me about things that are going on in your life and listen while I do the same. And if it just isn't working out for you anymore be man and tell me. For a complicated girl, I'm not too hard to figure out.
The Lord really helped me let go of something I had been holding onto for quite some time this week. I realized worrying about things I couldn't change wasn't doing anything but hurting me. It's an amazing feeling knowing that when we lay things at His feet and leave them there, He will ease our pain. Sometimes we learn more when we are held by the Lord rather than just being healed by the Lord.
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